Who is MNPoly?
Polyamory and Ethical Non-Monogamy in Minnesota
MNPoly stands for “Minnesota Polyamory.” We are a local Minneapolis/St. Paul group focused on building community, hosting events, and extending knowledge around the idea of ethical and consensual non-monogamy with a focus on Polyamory.
You can find us on the following platforms:
MNPoly is a 501(c)4 organized in Hennepin County, Minnesota.
Definition of Polyamory
While we acknowledge that the form and practice of polyamory vary widely between individuals, the following definition is taken from our Bylaws and serves as the organization’s basic working definition of polyamory: “MNPoly defines Polyamory as the belief in or practice of sustaining multiple concurrent romantic relationships with the knowledge and consent of all involved.”
Code of Conduct
MNPoly is committed to presenting a membership that is fun, friendly and informative for all
participants. This includes creating an atmosphere that is inclusive, harassment-free and sex positive. All
members are required to adhere to our code of conduct when attending events hosted by MNPoly,
advertised by MNPoly or whenever a member is volunteering for MNPoly or representing MNPoly in any
way.
MNPoly understands that human interaction can be complex and confusing. Please give each
other the benefit of explaining behavior you find offensive or unwelcome. However, participants that are
asked to stop any prohibited conduct are expected to MNPoly immediately. Please help each other learn
from mistakes and educate each other on the correct ways to handle the situations that arise.
Consent
Members will conduct themselves according to the principle of active consent. For any activity
there must always be active consent on all sides. Consent means two (or more) people deciding together
to do the same thing, at the same time, in the same way, with each other.
Consent cannot be given if an individual:
– is under the age of 18
– is incapacitated due to alcohol or other drugs
– is unconscious or asleep
– has limited mental capacity or is unable to understand what is going on
– is being coerced, intimidated, forced or under the threat of force
Consent is:
– a clear yes, not the absence of no
– an act of free will based on choice
– active, not passive. Silence and passivity do not equal consent.
– possible only when there is equal power
Things that are not consent:
– Consent to one event or action does not consent to another
– Pressuring someone into changing their mind is not consent
– Giving in because of fear is not consent
– Giving in or going along with someone to gain approval or to avoid being hurt is not consent
Inclusion
To ensure that all members of the ethical non-monogamous community are welcome in our
organization, MNPoly is consciously working to create a safe space for people of all races, religions,
gender identities, sexual preferences, socioeconomic statuses, and other marginalized categories. To this
end all events that are advertised on the MNPoly calendar must be open and welcoming to all members of the group.
Do not make assumptions about other people’s gender identity or expression. Do respect and
call people what they ask you to call them. If you aren’t asked please be as neutral as possible by not
using gender pronouns, and using generic terms.
MNPoly aims to create a safe and supportive environment for all its members. We encourage
members to listen to ALL people’s needs and stories when they are volunteered. We also ask that
members respect people’s privacy, boundaries and triggers.
Because many transgender individuals have faced harassment that can lead to discomfort and
even violence or arrest, MNPoly will make available gender-neutral bathroom facilities at our events
when possible.
Privacy
Members will
- Operate under the assumption that no one is out.
- Intentionally outing a member is grounds for immediate removal from the group.
- Refrain from using people’s names when talking about group events after the event.
- Refrain from photographing or recording people at events without their express consent.
- Refrain from “tagging” others in pictures or social media posts in reference to MNPoly.
- Refrain from privately contacting a member online without prior consent.
Harassment
MNPoly does not tolerate harassment in any form. Prohibited conduct includes but is not limited
to harassment related to gender, gender identity, sexual orientation, disability, physical appearance, body size, race, age, religion, deliberate intimidation, stalking, harassing photography or recording,
libel/slander, sustained disruption of talks or other events, inappropriate physical contact, and unwelcome sexual attention.
Respect of Relationships
Respect the private nature of relationship structures, and don’t ask invasive questions about someone’s relationships. Treat all relationship structures with respect. All forms of ethical non-monogamy are valid. Leave the labeling of relationships to the people involved. Polyamory is a journey, understand that everyone is not on the same place on the path as you may be. Be respectful of people’s choices in their relationships, even if it is not a choice that you would make.
Family Friendly Events
Parents or guardians should be aware not all group events are suitable for children. Family friendly events are clearly labeled as such in their description. This is not to say that events which are not labeled as “family friendly” will not be, but participants will not have that expectation or requirement. MNPoly expects that at family friendly events, all participants are to treat these families with courtesy and respect, and use good judgement regarding sexual behavior or topics when minors are Parents or guardians bringing children are responsible for their children’s behavior and needs.
Violations of the Code of Conduct
Any member who feels a violation of the Code of Conduct has occurred should contact the organizer of the event and/or group moderator IMMEDIATELY with as much information as possible including such things as screenshots or copies of correspondence or available witnesses.
The organizers/moderators will investigate the incident and take appropriate action on a case by
case basis. All actions taken will be reported to all individuals involved. Actions may include:
- Immediate warning and expectation of correction of behavior.
- Temporary loss of access
- Written Warning
- Permanent banning from events and removal from the group
- In the most severe cases the council will contact law enforcement and assist in any investigation.